My Grandma's Birthday

Yesterday was my grandma's birthday. She would have been 80 this year. It always amazes me how time flies and yet some things seem to stand perfectly still. It's hard to believe that she's been gone since 2002. So much has happened since then, it's sort of cruel how time just marches on and you look back at all the things that person has missed. And all that we've missed sharing with them. I mean, she has 2 great grandkids she never got to know. We have her pictures in the hall and all the kids point and talk about her. Even Griffin and Alyssa, even though they've never met her. We've told them so many stories and things that I think they feel like they know her a little. Alyssa walks by and points as she says, "That's my mamaw" so I guess it has sunk in.

There are lots of things I miss, she seemed to have the right thing to say when you really needed it. I mean, don't get me wrong, she could definitely say the wrong thing as well and I'd just crumble. But there are times when I am doing something and I can just hear her in my head, telling me one of her pearls of wisdom. LOL. Every time I see Savannah helping me with dinner I think of my grandma and how she loved to cook. I think of how much it would have meant to both Savannah and Mamaw to have been able to cook together. I don't know, so many things...I could ramble on forever. I guess bottom line is, while you miss someone so terribly for the physical reasons, hugs, kisses, conversations....they are never really gone because they never leave your mind or your heart. We can all talk about and "remember the time when...." and we're right back in the moment which is, I guess, the way we all live on in each other. Still, I would give just about anything to have a moment back so I could say the right things or just get a hug or ask her something I never took the time to ask. I guess I'll just have to wait until we meet again.